


The Boy You Knew

by YumKiwiDelicious



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: AU, Abduction, Angst, M/M, Poe Needs A Hug, Stormpilot, young!finn, young!poe
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-16
Updated: 2016-01-16
Packaged: 2018-05-14 06:36:26
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,667
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5733187
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/YumKiwiDelicious/pseuds/YumKiwiDelicious
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The cries seemed to be never ending and soon a trooper had to restrain nearly every person on the strip as they made to rush forward and save the children. They were outnumbered, however, and every child on Yavin 4 was taken that night, sent away on various ships never to be seen again. Long after the troopers had departed with one final threat not to follow or the younglings would be slaughtered, Poe laid on the ground staring at where the ship had been waiting for them to bring Finn back.</p><p>[[AU-Poe knew Finn before the First Order]]</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Boy You Knew

“Okay, now I know you’re making this up,” Poe Dameron, the youngest pilot in the New Republic Starfleet, scoffed, sitting back in his chair and folding his arm across his chest. He and a select few members of his squadron were huddled together at a table outside their main base headquarters, the bright sun of Yavin 4 causing them all to squint as they listened in on IoIo’s story. “There’s no way the son of Leia Organa and Han Solo defected to the Dark Side and...killed a bunch of baby Jedis. No way!”

“It’s true!” IoIo Arana shot back, his large Keshian eyes glaring back at his young commander who merely scoffed again, shaking his head all the while. “The whole of the Resistance is on guard now cause there’s no telling what that Solo kid is gonna tell the First Order. And with Luke Skywalker gone-”

“That’s another thing that doesn’t make sense in your story,” Karé Kun interjected, choosing to side with Poe if only just this once as she leaned her elbows on the table, chin in her hands, blonde hair caught in the breeze. “Why would Skywalker disappear after all that? I mean it was his nephew that revolted wasn’t it? He’s Organa’s twin brother, why abandon ship when her son is the one attacking it?”

“Probably because it’s all not true,” Poe goaded, beginning to rise from the table as IoIo threw a balled up bit of flight plan papers at him, “Ben Solo’s just a kid, even younger than me, there’s no way he managed to create some kind of cult and rise up against Luke Skywalker, one of the strongest Jedi’s of all time, and wipe out his academy. It’s just a rumor.”

“Whatever, Poe,” IoIo grumbled as Karé snickered, reaching forward to pat his hand sympathetically, “We’ll see how much you’re laughing when that kid’s coming at you with a saber.”

Rather than answer, Poe just winked and with a sarcastic salute began to stride away. The playful bickering of his squadmates following behind his back as he made his way through the outpost. Yavin 4 had gotten much more populated than it had been in his youth once New Republic fighters began to make base there. The young Dameron found he quite liked it compared to the solidarity he had felt in his youth with only him and his father around once his mother passed. An added bonus was being able to meet several people his mother had flown beside. Their stories of her bravery only solidified his wish to follow in her footsteps and become a pilot himself. And with hard work he had been able to join and rise the ranks quicker than almost anyone before him. He sometimes couldn’t even believe that at 20 he already had the command of Rapier Squadron, a group of T-85 X-Wings.

It had been hard going. Not just for Poe but for his father, Sergeant Kes Dameron, who didn’t cherish the idea of his only child joining the profession that had nearly killed him and his wife countless times. The two had been at odds for a time, but now Poe found there was no greater champion to have in his corner than his father. The man was non-stop, constantly giving encouragement and tips on how to be a better leader to his men (and women). If Shara Bey could see her boys now she’d have been beyond proud of how they’d managed to get on without her, though they missed her every day.

Poe reflected on all this as he sauntered through the forest like habitat of his home planet on his way to the landing pad that had been cleared just a few kilometers from his own house. His squadron wasn’t on duty today, but his father’s fleet was meant to be back any moment and he liked to be there to greet him home after a mission. Several others had the same idea and by the time he reached the pad, he was folded nicely into a crowd of his neighbors and fellow Republic officers. The whole of their group buzzed with excitement, chatting animatedly about the return of their loved ones. The sound of approaching X-Wings had just reached everyone’s ears when Poe was attacked from behind.

“Got you!” came a small voice as the young pilot was nearly bowled over, having to stagger for balance as he turned to look down at his assailant. “Got you, Poe!”

“Woah, buddy, you scared me,” Poe laughed, reaching down to untangle Finneen Boyega from around his legs. 

The dark skinned eight year old hopped out of reach, immediately diving back in to deliver quick jabs to Poe’s lower abdomen. The pilot laughed, crouching down slightly to square up with his neighbor and retaliate with his own ghost jabs. The boy was all smiles, with flashy teeth and bright eyes as he danced around the young man, laughing hysterically when Poe finally reached out and caught him in a gentle headlock.

“Submit, Finn!” he cried, rubbing his knuckles over the boy’s cotton soft hair.

“Never!” he bit back, wriggling and twisting his body for all he was worth as those around started to clear space for the hyperactive males. “I will defeat you!”

Poe laughed again, releasing the boy only to scoop him up and place him on his hip. It was harder than it used to be, Finneen being heavier than he’d been before, but Poe was stronger as well. He huffed, calling a truce as the boy continued to make attempts at boxing him at eye level. The Dameron-dubbed ‘Finn’ agreed and relaxed in his playmate’s hold, bony elbow resting on Poe’s shoulder as he settled down.

“I hate when mom goes on long missions,” he confessed with a pout, slightly winded from all the previous activity. The X-Wings were circling for landing now.

“Well, she’s back now, kiddo,” Poe assured once he’d done a quick count to ensure that everyone had, in fact, returned from their mission. “Plus, staying with grandma ain’t so bad.”

“Grandma’s so boring,” Finneen moaned dramatically, throwing his head back just as the first pilot touched down. “I like staying with you better.”

“Maybe next time,” Poe stated, eyes trained on the landing pad as he saw his father’s black X-Wing finally came in. 

Right beside it was a blue fighter and as soon as the cockpit opened Finneen squealed with delight. His squirming was so intense that Poe all but dropped the boy with a startled laugh. He hit the ground running and didn’t stop until he’d been swept into the arms of the pilot of the fighter. Leyata Boyega looked nearly identical to her son with large soulful eyes and a wide flat nose. As she hugged him, peppering kisses all over his laughing face, Poe smiled unable to tell where his skin started and hers began.

Kes Dameron approached his second in command and placed a large hand on her shoulder, smiling at her son as the small group approached where Poe stood. Poe greeted his father with an enthusiastic hug, the two men clapping each other heartily on the back. Beside them, Leyata was listening intently as her only child prattled on and on about everything that had occurred while she was away. They all meshed together like a big happy group and moved as one away from the landing pad, passersby congratulating Leyata and Kes on a safe mission.

“Dad,” Poe said through a laugh, having just listening to a rather humorous anecdote from their time away, “I heard this crazy rumor that Ben Solo revolted and Luke Skywalkers gone missing.”

The light smiles that had been on the two older pilots’ faces suddenly disappeared and Poe raised an eyebrow. He had of course not taken anything IoIo had told him to heart, but the sudden stoic silence that fell over his father and his fellow pilot made him start to second guess himself. Finn had of course not noticed anything, still talking while playing with the fluffy bun that was his mother’s hair.

“I mean that’s not...true is it?” Poe went to clarify.

“It’s been...a rough week for the Light Side, son,” Wes said gravely, settling a heavy hand on his son’s shoulder. Then, with help from Leyata, he went into the story of how Ben Solo defected to the Dark Side and, along with fellow traitors, killed all the Padawans under Skywalkers tutelage; younglings and teenagers alike. Any body not found and identified was presumed a defector and Luke Skywalker had vanished after delivering the news to each devastated parent in person.

“Word says one of the Padawans that joined him was a young girl,” Leyata finished the sad story, “Younger than Finneen.”

“Finn!” her son corrected in her arms, finally tuning in to a voice besides his own. The woman smiled at him, moving forward for another attack of kisses and Poe watched them trying to imagine how Leia Organa must feel now that her son had abandoned their cause. He looked back at his father who simply shook his head.

“The general and Solo are searching everywhere in the galaxy for their son,” he informed as they cleared the treeline in front of the Dameron household. The Boyega residence was within shouting distance just beyond the trees. “They should be here tomorrow.”

“That’s insane,” Poe breathed, unable to think of any other way to describe it. “How could he do that to his family?”

Kes just shrugged, but Leyata took pause and backtracked from where she had been heading towards her home. Hefting Finn higher up on her hip, she reached a hand out and touched Poe’s shoulder lightly. She’d known his mother and had watched him grow for years even before her own child was born and her husband died in battle. She was a good woman and Poe trusted her word above all others besides his father.

“Just...if you see them on the base, walking around and talking to people...have pity,” she advised gently, retracting her hand to rest it on her son’s back, “They are going through the unimaginable.”

Poe nodded, raising his hand in a weak wave in response to Finneen’s enthusiastic one as the two took their leave. His father’s arm fell around his shoulder and the Dameron men made their way inside, talking back and forth about what Ben Solo’s defection meant for the Light Side.

:::

“I think I could be a Jedi,” Finneen stated randomly from his seat at the kitchen counter in the Dameron home. Poe smirked, not lifting his eyes from the amber-root he was cutting. His father and Leyata along with their squadron had been called on an emergency mission just a few hours after their return. With much begging and pleading, Finn had convinced his mother to leave him in Poe’s care since it was unlikely they’d be gone more than a night.

“You’re not Force sensitive, buddy,” he said gently, not wanting to hurt the boy’s feelings, “Remember, Master Skywalker came and tested all the kids out when you were five.”

“I’ll be a different kind of Jedi,” the child clarified, finally drawing Poe’s gaze. “Just because I’m not Force sensitive doesn’t mean i can’t be a knight!”

“Why not join the Republic and be a pilot like me?” Here the dashing young pilot set down his knife and grinned. Finn burst out laughing, nearly tumbling off his stool before righting himself once more.

“Pilots have to go on missions all the time,” he reasoned, still giggling as Poe gave an exaggerated frown.

“So do the Jedi,” he countered, picking up his knife once more and going back to chopping, “Probably even more so than a pilot.”

The small human looked conflicted, brow furrowed and thick bottom lip caught between his teeth. Poe let him think in peace.

“If I’m a pilot and you’re a pilot we’d never get to see each other and I’d hate that,” he said at last with a deciding nod of his head. Poe smiled, genuinely touched at his young friend’s devotion and adoration. 

“I’d hate it too, buddy,” he conceded, nodding his agreement, “But hey you never know, maybe we get put in the same squadron.”

“That’d be awesome!”

The boy’s happy exclamation was punctuated by the sound of a shrill alarm. The two Yavinians jumped as the alert light on the far wall began to flash red, other lights going dark as if it needed to be accentuated even more. Finn was off his stool and at Poe’s side in an instant, tiny fingers digging into his guardian’s forearm. The alarm could be heard echoing all throughout the base, in every home and on every corner. The whole post had been bathed in red light.

“What’s going on?” Finneen yelled over the sound of the harsh whine, the din of voices already rising from outside.

“The pilot’s are coming back,” Poe provided, mind lost in panic because the alarm meant more than that. 

It meant the pilots were coming back, but there had been trouble with the mission. It meant the pilots were coming back, but there may be danger right on their tails. It meant the pilots were coming back, but some of them may not be coming back. Unfortunately all Finn needed to know was that his mom was approaching. With a joyful whoop he rushed for the door, throwing it open and running out into the dark completely ignoring Poe’s cries to wait. The youngest Dameron chased the youngest Boyega out of his house and managed to catch a glimpse of him disappearing into the treeline headed towards the landing pad.

“Finn, stop!”

It was useless as Finn continued to sprint forward, his tinier body ducking and jumping obstacles quicker than Poe’s taller frame was able. The boy was in sight but never in reach and Poe could hear others around them also rushing through the brush to see what the situation was. He kept repeating to himself mentally to stay calm; to get Finn to safety and then gather his squadron as quickly as possible and join the fight. And as the sound of approaching X-Wings and TIE fighters reached his ears he realized it really was going to be a fight. He reached the treeline, mere yards behind Finneen. The sky looked like it was on fire

“MOM!”

Leyata Boyega’s blue fighter was in the air and then suddenly it was up in flames. The TIE fighter that had shot her down zoomed right over their heads with terrible wail. Poe ran forward and snatched Finn to his chest, turning them away and shielding the youth with his body as Leyata’s ship crashed to the ground, debris and flames flying everywhere. Poe felt the heat on his back and knew the kind woman was dead as he clutched her son to him. When he turned back the smoke was so thick it made his eyes water and he was barely able to see as another group of TIE fighters flew overhead and destroyed their grounded fleet. His own X-Wing was now gone.

“Force help us.”

“THE STORMTROOPERS ARE COMING!”

He turned at the shrill scream of a woman just in time to see her gunned down by a stormtrooper as he emerged from the trees. In the chaos, the majority of Yavin 4’s citizens had fled to the landing strip and now as the First Order descended upon them they were trapped. Everywhere he turned Poe saw people he knew fleeing for their lives only to be caught up by men in helmets and forced back. He picked Finn up under his arm, determined to see him to safety and made a run for it. The young boy was sobbing.

He didn’t get very far up the strip before another squadron of troopers appeared before him, blasters raised. He dropped Finneen behind him, again using his own body as a shield. Others had had his same idea and as they met the wall of resistance threw their arms up in surrender, some even falling to their knees, outgunned, outmanned, outnumbered, and out-planned. The First Order had plotted this attack and struck when they least expected it. Poe only had a moment to wonder where his father might be before they were being overtaken and forced to return to the start of the landing strip, half of which was now in flames.

Arms over his head and Finn at his side, Poe Dameron was marched along with his neighbors and stood in a line where they were held at blasterpoint for what felt like an eternity, stormtroopers at their front and back. Further down he could spot IoIo, one of his large purple eyes swollen shut. Beside him stood Karé, pretty face streaked with tears as she looked out onto the burning wreckage of their best fleet. Poe recalled then that her own father had been on this mission as well. If his fighter was present amongst the chaos it was unrecognizable now. The whole surrounding area had been shot to hell in the attack, several kilometers of the forest wrecked and ruined, and Poe didn’t even want to think about how the main village looked. He knew the First Order had probably sent enough troops to subdue the whole planet.

“Comply with our demands and you will not be harmed,” came the booming voice of stormtrooper in a silver uniform. He stood at the forefront of the squadron facing them to the front and had a long black cape that scraped the ground behind him. “But if any of you attempt to disobey the wishes of the First Order you will all be executed.”

When he’d said his piece, the apparent captain of the unit gave a nod and a select few troopers descended on the hostages. Starting at different points in the line they examined each person, mostly the young men, looking them up and down and grabbing a rough hold on their faces. Poe’s blood boiled thinking of them doing that to him, but he stayed silent as they went about whatever their task was. Beside him Finneen sniffled, tears streaking down his dark cheeks as his arms shook beside his head. Poe wanted nothing more than to reach out and comfort him, but figured it was a bad idea after the man that ran the cantina in town received the butt of a blaster to the gut for putting his arms down. Instead he just whispered words of encouragement.

“Be brave, buddy, we’re gonna get outta this.”

“I’m scared, Poe.”

“Don’t be. I won’t let anything happen to you.”

The examination continued, but as a trooper grew closer to Poe he could suddenly hear a faint cry over the sound of fighters burning. It was far off in the distance as if several people were screaming at once and it made sweat drip at the base of his neck as a faceless trooper came to stand right in front of him. The expressionless helmet still somehow managed to look intimidating as the person, man or women he could not tell, leaned right into his personal space. If he had thought eye contact mattered to these kind of people, he’d have thought the trooper was trying to look him in his. As it was, there was no telling what he or she had been looking at before he or she pulled away.

“Too old,” a shockingly feminine voice decided, any further characteristics besides its high quality muffled by the mask. Poe blinked as she passed him to stand before Finn.

If the apparent cries of horror in the distance made him sweat, the way the trooper sized up Finn made him feel faint. She had to look down at the boy whose face was still a wreck and whose skinny arms were trembling with the effort of being held up so long. He was the only child present out on the strip, most his age probably having been ordered to stay home or even hidden once it became clear attack was evident. As such it made Poe very uneasy that the stormtrooper appeared to be so interested in him. The unease turned to straight panic as she raised a gloved hand and pointed right at Finneen.

“This one.” Before either of the Yavinians could blink, a trooper came from behind and snatched Finn up under his arm. Poe immediately gave shout of protest and lunged for the brute only to be knocked back by the woman. “Restrain him.”

“POE! POE, HELP ME!”

“FINN!”

The youngest pilot in the New Republic’s attempts to reach his friend were futile. It took two stormpilots to restrain him, but they managed it. And so Poe watched, half choked by an arm around his throat, as Finn was carried away screaming. He struggled and kicked, but in the end he was just too small and could not fight off the trooper who carried him towards a large ship that was approaching on the opposite side of the strip. Poe struggled and kicked, but in the end was not strong enough and could not get to him.

“DON’T LET THEM TAKE ME, POE! HELP!”

His cries were joined by an assemblage of others as several stormtroopers emerged from the treeline, each dragging with them at least one child of Yavin 4. All humans, but all of different ages and races. One trooper even cradled a fussing baby to its breastplate. All screaming.

Tears streaked Poe Dameron’s face as he realized the wailing he’d heard had been the desperate cries of parents as their children were ripped from their arms and stolen from their hiding places. He could feel his heart hammering in his chest as they were all carted away by the faceless foot soldiers of the First Order. He’d heard about things like this happening, but again had not believed them to be true. He had never wanted to believe stormtroopers were really kidnapped younglings. But they were taking Finneen.

“HELP! HELP US!”

“MOMMY! DADDY!”

“I DON’T WANT TO GO!”

The cries seemed to be never ending and soon a trooper had to restrain nearly every person on the strip as they made to rush forward and save the children. They were outnumbered, however, and every child on Yavin 4 was taken that night, sent away on various ships never to be seen again. Long after the troopers had departed with one final threat not to follow or the younglings would be slaughtered, Poe laid on the ground staring at where the ship had been waiting for them to bring Finn back.

:::

The next day a list of names of pilots killed in the initial confrontation with the trooper fleet would arrive. Poe’s father’s name would be on it. With his letter of condolence in hand he would meet General Leia Organa and Han Solo who would give their own condolences and tell him they could use someone like him in the Resistance. He would decline.

Three days later he would go to Major Lonno Deso and beseech him to contact the Resistance for aid in chasing down the ships and rescuing the younglings. He would decline and Poe would go to the Millennium Falcon and agree to join the Resistance. Karé and IoIo would join with him.

12 years later he would meet FN-2187.

FN-2187 with his large soulful eyes and wide flat nose when he takes off his helmet to tell Poe he’s rescuing him.

FN-2187 who he dubs ‘Finn’ without thinking until he wakes up after a crash landing realizing he’d lost Finn again.

Finn who is all smiles with flashy teeth and big bright eyes when he realizes Poe is still alive and meets him halfway for a hug that feels like it’s 12 years over due to the pilot.

Finn who he feels deep in his heart is Finn, but who it takes almost losing to muster up the courage to ask about it.

“Do you remember anything about your life before the First Order?” he asks, slumped low in his usual chair beside Finn’s med-bed. He’d only been awake for a few days, still restricted to lying on his stomach so as not to irritate his back, but Poe couldn’t wait any longer. The young man squints at him funnily before shaking his head.

“No,” he confirms, “No one does. They take it all away from you so you only know loyalty to the Order.”

“How?”

“Conditioning,” he says with a shrug that looks like more trouble than it’s worth. “Electrocution torture sometimes if someone’s really difficult.” The bottom falls out of Poe’s stomach and he barely has the heart to ask if that what they did to him. Finn shrugs again. “Wouldn’t know, they wipe that too eventually. They only want you to know the pain you receive when you fail so you’re motivated...not to fail.”

An awkward silence follows punctuated by the several machines keeping track of Finn’s well-being before the younger of the two asks why Poe wants to know.

“I had...a friend,” He begins slowly, fingers knit over his stomach and eyes trained on anything but the person in the bed, “When I was younger. He was taken by the First Order and I just thought...”

“That I’d know him?” Finn provides when it became clear he doesn’t have the heart to go on. Poe smirks somewhat bitterly and shrugs replying it was something like that. Finn looks truly despondent as he shakes his head minutely. “Sorry,” he sympathizes, “The kid you knew is gone.”

The blow to Poe’s heart is evident on his face. Finn backtracks in a panic, going so far as he push himself up on his elbows, reaching a hand out to grab Poe’s arm before he can exit the room.

“I didn’t mean it like that,” he nearly groans, pain visible in every line of his face. Poe calms him back down to his stomach and wipes the sweat from his brow as he pants and continues. “I’m not saying he’s dead. Plenty of us make it to adulthood, just look at me,” he clarifies with a shaky laugh. His eyes flutter and Poe curses internally thinking he may be about to pass out from pain. “It’s just...that kid has no idea he was ever that kid. He doesn’t know who he was and probably won’t ever know.”

Poe can see in his eyes that this is a truth that haunts him and that he wishes like hell were false, but is not. He can tell Finn wants nothing more than to be his Finn, but the truth is they may never know. But suddenly it doesn’t seem like the worst thing in the world. This Finn never knowing about that Finn means Poe never having to explain how both of his parents were killed by the Order he devoted the first part of his life to. This Finn never knowing about that Finn means Poe never having to see the hurt in his eyes as he questions why Poe wasn’t strong enough to save him. This Finn never knowing about that Finn means they don’t have to share an unknown amount of time navigating the awkwardness that is the fact Poe used to babysit him. 

This Finn maybe never knowing about that Finn means Poe can kiss this Finn at that moment with at least some small amount of guiltlessness.But kissing this Finn also means he’s all in. It means honesty and loyalty and talking about that other Finn he’d known when he was a boy. Because he still knows that boy even if he doesn’t know himself anymore and maybe he won’t fight to get him back, but he’ll definitely fight to see him remembered. 

Because this Finn is that Finn. He just knows it.

**Author's Note:**

> SEVERAL THINGS!  
> 1\. I know in the movie Finn and Poe are only 9 years apart, but this is meant to be set in the same universe as Don't Leave Me and I made Rey and Ben 9 years apart and I picture Finn 1 year older than Rey and Poe 4 years older than Ben. Sooo 12 year age gap, I'm sorry  
> 2\. I know Poe's dad is supposed to be alive and retired,but...nah  
> 3\. You must be outta your GODDAMN MIND if you think I'm not gonna keep throwing LMM/Hamilton references into everything  
> 4\. You can honestly decide for yourself whether you think Finn is Finneen...but Poe thinks he is...and I think he is...just saying  
> 5\. Can you see all the parallels between young Finn and young Rey (as far as I've written them)...cuties  
> 6\. Young Rey is references in this when Leyata mentions a young girl defecting because (as far as I've written) she OBVIOUSLY wasn't found with the slaughtered Padawans and no one knows Ben left her on Jakku sooo people would assume she joined the dark side...baby sith  
> 7\. I have a tumbr now where I post all my worrisome thoughts about this and other pairing. but mostly this one right now. title's same as my name on here  
> 8\. Kept Boyega as a last name cause it sounds outer-spacey AF to me  
> So much more, but I've forgotten.


End file.
